There is nothing wrong, with patting yourself on the back. It is often said, that the only one you can count on is you, because you know that your the only one to show up, for everything. We all know that counting on someone is difficult to do, because when we open up to someone, we also, open up to disappointment and hurt. The only thing that is certain, is our ability to work through it, because part of growth is believing that what you don’t know, you can certainly learn. Be sure to acknowledge your accomplishments, the more you do, the more you will want to do.
May your Christmas be filled with love and joy this Christmas Season.
I always wondered why we find the truth to be so elusive. In daily discussion or ordinary conversations, why one feels the need to lie , or even embellish. The first thought to come to mind is to protect, but protect against what? one might ask. Do we honestly believe that the truth is the culprit, and that speaking it or believing in it, is going to cause us more pain. Why do we feel the need to hide from the truth, giving it fangs and horns only adds fear to an already elusive beast, and running from it certainly doesn’t slow it down. It’s bound to catch up with you at some point, then what do you do? Keep running or keep lying. One thing is for sure, after awhile it’ll be to difficult to tell the difference anymore, because one lie leads to another, then another, and yet another. Who knows anymore, right!
Denial is known as a “refusal to see.” This happens when an individual’s perception of reality is challenged. They protect themselves from the truth by believing in a lie. No matter what you say there is no way to convince them otherwise, because knowing their truth, would shatter the illusion of life as they know it. Therefore, making that life meaningless. That’s why people can’t change, until they become ready. I call it the “desire” otherwise known as “the willingness” to believe. This becomes the crack in the door, the first step.
Reflection is a great learning tool, it allows us to acknowledge our mistakes and make revisions. The past also allows us the ability to see our patterns and become aware of the way we respond to them. This knowledge is profound, when it comes to change. Being able to understand what drives and motivates specific behaviour is necessary in healing.
How do I choose to make an impact, what is it that fuels me. These are the questions that have baffled many. In most cases the answers are found when you stop searching. It’s then that we become open, open to receive the answers. Most of my lessons were learned when I became willing and vulnerable. I like to refer to it as the ripple affect. Pain creates vulnerability, which creates healing, which creates change. Looking at the ripple affect, on a grander scale you can see how the actions of one can affect many. Thinking this way allows us to see how we make an impact on others by the words we speak and the actions that we carelessly perform each and everyday. Taking responsibility is how to impact the world and it will fuel new behaviour and change for you and everyone it touches. Remember, all roads lead back to you.
The Truth Made Simple
“To know thyself,” is the question that’s being posed, very few can answer this. In most cases, individuals assume that your referring to mental intellect. I’m referring to emotional intelligence. Ask yourself, why do you react the way you do, or how do you feel about yourself. These are the questions that can only be answered when one becomes aware, which requires you to be able to view your actions as they occur. The goal is to become aware of what drives your behaviour. In order to do that, we need to increase our sensitivity to emotions and instincts. This occurs when we can explore our thoughts, beliefs and biases. Like anything, this takes practice, one way to accomplish this is through mindful meditation. Where you pick a focal point, for instance, your heart beat. Once your able to develop this observing self and activate it. You will gain more prospective on your life experiences.
I choose to use creativity to access all my emotional parts, by using inner dialogue it allows me to name each and everyone of my emotions, and ultimately claim the individual patterns that they created. Once you can except that your personality is a collection of patterns. It becomes easier to see how your emotions can be triggered. Creativity can open up a brand new way of seeing things. As children it was readily available to us at any given time, until society’s programming stripped us of our innate ability. Creativity is still alive in all of us, all we have to do is connect with it. The best way to do that, is through reflection. So, take a moment and recall a time as a child when you were being creative. You might of been building a fort with sheets, and cushions or making paper dolls. Bring that image to the forefront of your mind. Then let that image embody you, begin to invoke the freedom and pleasure that comes from that creative space. Now, this may take some getting used to. But with practice you can learn to evoke different emotions with varying affects. The point is we are all capable of accessing our own creativity, with practise it will become easier. Just remember to have fun!
We seldom, allow ourselves the privilege of opening up anymore. With fear of judgement and lack of trust, we have to ask if it’s our misgivings or just the fear of being vulnerable. Like being naked in the middle of winters frost. Is it the cold or the nakedness that we fear most. When we stop to ponder these thoughts. The truth of our humanness is revealed. It becomes clear that how others choose to view us is far more important than any knowledge that maybe gained from the experience. The truth is that other people’s opinions matter, far more than they should.